Puddings & Toyboys

A blog about my beautiful budgies.

The last weeks and days in the life of Phineas (3 of 3)

So Phineas was due to have surgery in the afternoon of the 6th September.  I had left him at the hospital at around 14:30.  At half past five, I still had not heard anything, so I rang the vets.  I was told he had not had the surgery yet.  It was possible it would not be done until the following day.

In a later phone call they suggested that he stay overnight at the hospital (free of charge) to minimise stress & he would be seen in the morning.  I asked if I could visit him that evening but they said all their visiting rooms were booked.  Because I could not see him, I rang several times to check he was okay.  Each time, I was told he was settled & that he was ‘absolutely fine’.  I cannot say that *I* was feeling ‘absolutely fine’.  I was in bits.

Last photo of Phineas

Last photo of Phineas

The next morning, I was told he was ‘bright & happy’.  I cannot say that even this comforted me as it did not sound like Phineas.  I appreciate that strangers will not know him as I do, but *I* would have felt ‘bright & happy’ had they told me he was ‘grumpy & sulky’ – a far more normal description, particularly under the circumstances.  They also told me that he would be seen at 1pm the earliest.  So, another long wait…

I will not log the details of what happened next as they are still too upsetting for me to share.  In short, during the surgery, Phineas went into cardiac arrest & they could not revive him.

It was several days before I could even discuss the surgery with the vet.  It turned out to be very complicated.  She was confident that Phineas had an aggressive cancerous growth that in turn had caused a hernia.  It was not a relatively simple case of ‘removal of mass’ (as expected), because his abdominal contents had spilled out & were entwined in the growth.  How my poor boy even functioned was a mystery.  It is likely that had he survived the surgery, he would not have had long afterwards.

Right now, I find no comfort in anything.  All I know is that he was in good spirits when I left him.  I wish *I* had not left him.  And I dearly wish he was still here.  I know from experience that time will gradually heal these feelings…. but in the meantime, I am desperately sad & missing my wonderful little friend.

 

 

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4 responses to “The last weeks and days in the life of Phineas (3 of 3)

  1. Pingback: The last weeks and days in the life of Phineas (2 of 3) | Puddings & Toyboys

  2. selah 21 September 2016 at 00:10

    I’m very sorry for your loss..

    Liked by 1 person

  3. rosebudgie 21 September 2016 at 08:41

    You may not have been with the dearest boy in person, Sweetpea, but you were most definitely with him in spirit and he knows that very well!

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Pingback: Remembering Phineas: The unanswered question | Puddings & Toyboys

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